Due to a local fundraiser at the village, I have gracefully rummaged through my elder valet’s personal belongings, and donated £20. Anyway, they have hired the lower field in which an Archery competition is to be held. My loon of a mother-in-law Doreen is currently standing in the middle of the grounds holding a target board.
My only concern is, how can I be sure spectators are safe?
Any advice on a mother-in-law situation?
Posted in Elder Law.
5 Responses
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You can’t really. It sounds like she’s a terrible menace to health & safety and the public at large. Have her sectioned and be done with it.
Enjoy the festivities!
Tie her hands to it. That way, she can run, but, she can’t throw any at anyone.
The only way to safe guard the spectators old boy is to have your mother-in-law strap a giant magnet to her head thus attracting the metal tip out of the public domain, a most satisfactory situation all round I say. Tip top.
My dear Sir Blackadder – At last an easy one to answer! Have you ever seen a bull out in the field when the farmer wants to keep him away from the cows? Just chain your mother-in-law to a small area mid-field. Be sure she is on a very short leash that she cannot possibly undo. Then firmly attach the target to her hands (so she cannot throw it at the archers. That should provide a good goal for the competition & keep the competitors quite safe. You may, however, want to put the old girl on a rotating pedestal though. Tell the archers it’s too increase the level of difficulty, but you never can tell – one of them might just hit the old girl & end all your problems with her for good! Have fun!
Hello old boy! I say……….. how to answer that pickle of a question….
Why not employ all the suggestions kindly and lovingly given to you by your faithful comrades (us lot)?
Or…… simply put your mother in law at one end of the field (within firing distance, of course) and the ‘public’ at the other, supplying the paying public with binoculars.
What-ho! Good luck old chap! Let us know how the competition goes and if needs be, I will supply the name of a reputable undertakers should your mother in law meet with an unfavourable end….
Ta ta!